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On behalf of our band, "Johnny, Mark and the Ricks," I want thank Mark and Maralyn for the numerous opportunities we got to play at their club, DiPiazza's.
They were kind enough to let us perform many Halloween, Saint Patrick's Day and New Years Eve gigs, as well as other nights, and let us howl like scalded monkeys as we banged on our petroleum-fueled guitars. Our band is now defunct due to suffering "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune," but we remaining members truly cherish the times we were allowed to perform on that wonderful stage that would flex with the heavy pounding of our drummer and the thundering of our amps.
We want to wish both of you a happy retirement and thank you so much for everything. To quote Billy Shakespeare again, "Vaya con dios, mi funky amigos!"
For Johnny, Mark and the Ricks
My wife was recently injured in a fall due to an uneven sidewalk on Ocean Boulevard. These hazards exist all over our city and I haven't seen much improvement in the past 18 years.
If these can't be fixed to due budgetary constraints, the city needs to mark these raised edges with fluorescent paint to make them more visible to pedestrians. Failure to act is gross negligence and unacceptable.
Big Trucks, Bad Times
Did you know that if you drive a monster truck or gigantic SUV, you are now entitled to drive as fast as you please on any residential street?
Not only do you get to generate the maximum possible amount of CO2 into our atmosphere, (plus assorted carcinogens), now, thanks to our negligible police presence, there is no reason at all to obey traffic laws! Speed, run stop signs, tailgate, all the fun things you are now entitled to do.
Oh, and don’t forget your right to endanger and instill fear in pedestrians, especially children walking and skate-boarding to school.
No Homeless Crisis
Shame on you. Yes, shame on those of you who buy an expensive new bike knowing that you are tempting a homeless person to steal it.
I’ve often wondered, where do people who are supposedly penniless and living “hand to mouth” in a pup-tent get those high price bicycles? I see them everywhere patrolling our neighborhoods, picking through the recycling barrel; some of them even have an infant carrier trailing behind them to carry what they have collected. Where did they get that? What are the theft and burglary statistics in East Long Beach?
Politicians love to label any situation a crisis. It gives them an excuse to pound their chest and pretend to provide a remedy by raising taxes. We don’t have a “homeless crisis.” We have a “tolerating criminals crisis.” Here are my two solutions.
Number one: Require the police to enforce all bicycle vehicle codes and then use that as probable cause to run the bicycle frame number to see if it is a reported stolen.
Number two: Any politician who wishes to buy a new bike shall be required to buy two and give one to a transient. Problems solved. They should also donate 50% of their income to the transients to show their commitment to eliminating the “crisis.” Just don’t raise my taxes to support bicycle thieves and criminals.