Forget about Amazon​:​ If you need a book at a reason​able rate — mainly nothing — free tomes are offered at ​such neighborly outdoor locations​ as:

​Ma​ ​'n Pa Free Library ​(​Roycroft​​ ​Avenue ​and ​C​olorado​ Street)​;

Riley's Red Wagon Book ​S​wap (St. Joseph​ ​​Avenue​ and Vista​ Street​);

Linda's ​Library ​(​near ​Prospect Avenue​ and Broadway​)​; and​

Anonymous (G​r​anada ​Avenue ​and ​The ​Toledo)

Not only is the price right, but there's another advantage. If you don't like the plot or maybe you dribbled a little soup on a couple of pages (as I have been known to do), hey, feel free to make a book return, no questions asked!

• On the 405, I noticed a Kia ad that said, "0-6 in 4.7 seconds."

It made me recall the funny parodies of such commercials that Volkswagen used to run for its Bug half a century ago.

They carried such captions as "Think small," "It makes your house look larger" and "Ugly is only skin deep" (see photo).

As for speed, one billboard said: "0-60. Yes."

You know, if the 405 added a VWs-only lane, I might buy one.

• Talk about puncturing security: A reader reports that her boyfriend wanted to play darts at a local bar and, as is customary, was asked to turn over his keys as security. When he was finished, he went to retrieve his keys only to find out they had accidentally been given to another patron. Last I heard, he still hadn't recovered them.

​• ​The Golden Globes inaugurated Hollywood's​ ​award season​ and​ I'm still holding out hope that a special ​honor will be conferred upon Long Beach's Community Hospital for becoming the first such facility to offer in-​room movies.

Not on television — on the screen of the old Circle Drive-In next door to the Traffic Circle.

The innovation came about ​inadvertently​ in 1960 after Community added a 6-story maternity wing that gave a great view of the theater's big screen. ​The hospital made deals with the drive-in and with General Telephone to have sound piped into its rooms.

Long Beachite Tom Howard, 80, whose two sons were born at Community, recalled that the set-up was convenient to would-be-dads ​who stayed out of the delivery room,​ if not ​always ​for would-be moms.

"You had husbands sitting out there (in the waiting room) drinking a Coke and watching a movie while Mom's in labor," he said.

A few years later, TV sets were installed in each room and, coincidentally, dads-to-be started working up the courage to witness births.

• I overheard two baristas in a coffee shop comparing notes about ​cleaning up at home after after their dogs.

A customer nodded in sympathy. "Oh, do you have a pet?" one barista asked the customer.

"No, I have a baby," he responded. "He drools."

Steve Harvey can be located at and @sharvey9.

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